Welcome to Carrie the musical, bitches.
I’m really not a fan of musicals because let’s face it, they can be a trainwreck but like most things, this horror-musical worked all too well in the quirky, murderous town of Riverdale.
Who knew this town and its resident wholly embodied the thriller’s characters?
There was Alice, the worried and abandoned mother; Veronica, the rich, entitled mean girl; Archie, the hero who lost his way but always did the right thing in the end; Betty, the good girl next door; and of course, Cheryl, the girl who has faced years of abuse from her diabolical mother.
Any mother who doesn’t let her daughter participate in after-school activities is the definition is the worst.
Part of why the musical worked so well is because the writers found a way to tell the story authentically through the episode.
Strange occurrences started happening around the original Carrie, Cheryl’s brush with death when the sandbag almost took her out, just like in the film.
At first, everyone chocked it up to simple coincidence or a student scorned about not getting the part.
Then, notes from the Black Hood started appearing, although, once again, it was a fake-out because we all know the hooded-figure wouldn’t actually spend time cutting out letters from a magazine. What kind of sicko would emulate the town’s worst killer for their own amusement?
Ethel was the number one suspect and while I can see her going to those lengths, especially as she was vying for Cheryl’s part in the first place, I don’t think she actually had it in her to murder.
Because, of course, this is a horror-movie inspired episode and much like in the musical, things took a violent, dark and unexpected turn except this time, it was Midge as Carrie who became the victim.
Yes, we’ve dealt with murder before but that scene was terrifying; the stuff of nightmares!
Obviously, the question of “who-dun-it” lingers and will carry over into the following episode.
I’m going to put my detective cap on quickly and say that whoever wanted Cheryl out of the picture knew that Midge was her understudy. Cheryl was never the target, they just needed to spook Kevin off enough so that he would replace her. Midge was always the target,
Therefore, it couldn’t have been Ethel because her feud was with Cheryl. I’d see her going to great lengths to punish Veronica but not Midge so I’m eliminating her from my suspect list.
Before the show kicked off, there was a minor but tense moment between Fangs and Midge in the dressing room. It almost seemed as if Kevin had walked it on his boyfriend and Midge hooking up which would give him a motive, but I don’t think Kevin would kill a fly.
However, shortly after, we saw Moose angrily darting through the hallway and pushing Jughead out of the way. Since Moose is Midge’s boyfriend, maybe he found out about the affair and “took care of it.”
We also can’t rule out creepy-as-hell Chic since he was backstage when he wasn’t supposed to be and was the only one who was sitting calmly in the panicked audience at the end of the episode in a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it moment.
I don’t really think Chic would have anything to gain from crucifying Midge like that but you never know.
If Betty is so spooked by her own brother, why did she invite him in the first place?
Jughead’s terribly-recorded footage will likely play a huge role in finding out who the murderer was. At least all of his hard work will pay off and he’ll even get a good high-school musical turned murder documentary out of it. I’m sure he could sell it to Netflix.
And don’t worry, just cause Midge didn’t get to wear the iconic blood-drenched prom dress doesn’t mean it was completely omitted from the episode.
Cheryl, whose middle name may as well be Carrie at this point, finally took back control of her life. For some time, it seemed like Cheryl had lost her edge, but Toni was there to remind her that she once burned down Thornhill so she could take on a bully like her mother.
And Cheryl marched right in, covered in blood, threatening to set fire to everything again if she didn’t get what she wanted — emancipation and Thistlehouse. Oh, and Nana Rose because obviously, she wasn’t going to leave behind dear old gran with those pigs. Is this the end of Penelope as we know it? I really do hope so.
The episode was jam-packed with storylines, some of them never really got to shine before it was on to the next scene.
In case you forgot, Riverdale is still deeply embroiled in the battle for a new Mayor and the showdown is happening between two former lovers Fred Andrews and Hermione Lodge.
No one is more torn about this than Archie and Hiram hopes to utilize this by making sure ensuring that he drives a wedge between Fred and Archie.
However, it seems Hiram underestimated Archie and his loyalty to his father because after he visited Fred simply to brag and dangle the car he bought his son in his face, Archie finally saw what kind of man he really was.
Shortly after, Archie returned the Thunderbird and told Hiram never to come between him and his dad again because he will lose. There’s the Archie we’ve always loved!
He’s not some spoiled kid who drives fancy cars or can be bribed by expensive gifts — he’s the sensitive jock who fixes up old cars with his dad and supports him effortlessly.
Alice Cooper has finally realized that her overpowering ways have pushed everyone away so she’s holding onto whatever is still familiar by joining the high school play and re-living her glory days.
I guess it would also explain her renewed interest in FP Jones, however, I’m disappointed that after pursuing him, she ended up right back with Hal. Obviously, there is absolutely no love left in their marriage if the man didn’t even know she was allergic to Peonies.
And do I really have to remind everyone that he’s been finding comfort with charlatan Penelope? Gross.
Last we checked, Hal thought being free of Alice was a blessing so why the change of heart?
It truly broke my heart to see FP show up at the play to support Alice before seeing her back in Hal’s arms. Come on, we were so close!
- Betty and Veronica sounded angelic when they harmonized. They should do that every episode.
- Archie’s dancing should win some award. He can pull off so much but dancing is not one of those things.
- How are they all such good singers? Was that a casting requirement? Even fricking Barb can sing! Yes, she will always be Barb to me.
- Do they really have a Lovers Lane in Riverdale?
- Archie’s face when Alice broke down via sing-song should probably also win an Oscar or something.
- Whose blood did Cheryl have smeared all over her? I rooted for our girl, but I was also terrified of her. Hey, that’s what you get for succumbing your daughter to conversion therapy!
- Betty was a bit of a hypocrite for calling out Veronica for being a terrible friend when like Archie said, V forgave her for all the stuff Blackhood made her do. However, I have no remorse for Veronica who stands by idly and watches her parents manipulate everyone and only do what’s in their best interest.
Riverdale Theory: What Secret Connects the Hot Parents?
Everyone knows that aside from Varchie and Bughead, the real stars of Riverdale are the hot, slightly dysfunctional, parents.
Come Riverdale Season 3, the writers are finally giving the people what they want — more screen time for the aforementioned hot parents.
15 Things We’re Hoping to See on The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina
With the re-emergence of the pumpkin spice latte, there’s no denying that fall is on the horizon.
By now, you’re probably well aware of Netflix’s latest addition, the one that’s supposed to feed your October Stranger Things void, or as I like to call it, The Chilling Adventures of Sabrina.
Though it was originally dubbed a Riverdale spin-off and Sabrina the Teenage Witch reboot, the series has taken on such a new identity, it can’t even be compared to either anymore.
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When Riverdale resumes for its third season on October 10th, you can expect to see a few new faces in the mysterious small town.
And given that the bulk of the series has focused on murders, you shouldn’t be too shocked when I tell you not all of the new folks in town have good intentions for our favorite Serpents and/or honorary Serpents.
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