The third of the eldritch terrors – the Weird – has arrived in Greendale on Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Season 4 Episode 3.
This terror came directly to Faustus Blackwood, who eagerly offered up his own body to host the Weird One. Unfortunately, the entity wasn’t interested because it had its eye on another… Sabrina Spellman, who it deemed stronger than Blackwood.
You know that had to bruise his ego.
Mary Wardwell suggested a Trojan horse in order to get close to Sabrina. A corpse containing the entity is delivered to the Spellman Mortuary.
Despite the threats facing Greendale, Sabrina is more focused on romance as she does a spell to essentially grow her own boyfriend that’s sweet and sensitive like Harvey and powerful with a dash of danger like Nick.
I couldn’t help but chuckle at the fact that the “Grow a Boyfriend” is actually something you can purchase at an actual store. Magical powers not included.
Also, Sabrina may be an all-powerful witch, but she’s also relatable. After going on two bad dates, she realized it’s a waste of time when she can just make her ideal man. A true icon.
Ambrose holds a seminar to prepare the coven for the terrors to come, but well, he doesn’t seem to know much about how to stop them. All Ambrose is really able to divulge is that they are inhuman, unkillable, and world-destroying, which doesn’t exactly elicit confidence.
On the plus side, he shows the coven Harvey and Roz’s prophetic clues about the six additional terrors to come so that they can prepare, remain vigilant, and report any strange disturbances and manifestations.
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Of course, this begs the question how two mere mortals were able to see and draw the images. While Harvey chocks it up to Roz’s sixth sense, Mambo Marie becomes intrigued and believes there’s more to the story.
She appears at Roz’s home later that day to inform her that she is no cunning woman but a Weird woman, better known as a witch, who is crucial to helping the coven fight off the terrors.
Roz isn’t convinced, but a visit from Nana reveals that the voodoo Queen is right. Since the Walker women were god-fearing Christian women, they couldn’t exactly refer to themselves as witches, so they embraced the term “cunning women” instead.
Mambo Marie emphasizes that they need Roz’s powers to help defeat the eldritch terrors.
Roz eventually visits the Academy and proves her skills by correctly guessing all the cards in a deck while blindfolded. Prudence is shooketh.
Roz’s arrival comes at the right time as she also warns the ladies that the king’s from hell are coming for Lilith’s baby.
Remember on Chilling Adventures of Sabrina Season 4 Episode 2 when Sabrina Morningstar told Sabrina that Caliban was marrying her for the right reasons? Turns out, Sabrina was right to be skeptical because he put on a good act.
With the Queen of Hell and Lucifer Morningstar off touring the nine circles of Hell, Caliban plots his reign and does a spell to speed up Lilith’s pregnancy as he “won’t have his title threatened by Lucifer and Lilith’s bastard.” Ego-driven and power-hungry, much?
Lilith realizes something is wrong and escapes to the mortal realm where she begs Aunt Zelda to help her deliver her baby.
Aunt Zelda gathers the coven, who shares Lilith’s pain and helps her deliver “the perfect little devil.” Media often portrays catty women turning on each other, so it’s a powerful scene that shows how supportive women can be when they come together.
Caliban is upset that Lilith got away, so he sends the king’s to fetch the baby so he can kill it. The coven once again bands together to protect baby Adam from Caliban’s wrath. Aunt Zelda then offers Lilith permanent shelter.
Lucas Hunt, a new student arrives at Baxter High, and partners up with Sabrina. He asks her to dinner, but she immediately shuts it down. Roz questions why she won’t give such a good looking guy a chance, and considering the Grow a Boyfriend is still “growing” in her bathtub, Sabrina changes her mind.
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During the date, she gets super personal and explains that she’s been feeling quite lost in life as she doesn’t understand where she fits into the grand scheme of the universe. Ugh, being 16, am I right?
While the date ends with a promising kiss on the cheek, Sabrina later finds herself in the tub as Lucas manifests himself as the Weird.
The next day in class, Sabrina hears a high-pitched sound while attempting to dissect a squid.
Lucas offers to take her home. The two begin hooking up when he pushes her off because her tonuge feels really weird. When he takes a look at it, he flees quickly as Sabrina realizes her tongue resembles a slimy octopus. That’s bound to ruin the mood.
Ambrose explains that she’s turning into a squid-human hybrid as her body hosts a parasitic entity resembling an octopus aka The Weird, which hopes to use her body to attack the Earth.
Ambrose does a full-body scan to find that the octopus is inside her intestines. While they need to act quickly, it becomes evident that trying to cut Sabrina open will only kill her. Their only option is to make Sabrina’s body inhospitable by draining it of water so that the octopus won’t be able to survive.
The process is dangerous as draining the body could cause her organs to shut down.
Nick assists in the process because he’s worried about Sabrina, but everything goes smoothly as she throws up the octopus.
The next day at school, Sabrina begins channeling the Weird during class and orders everyone to kill themselves to become nourishment for The Void.
For some reason, Lucas isn’t affected by the spell bares witness to all of it. When Ambrose realizes what’s happening, he books it to the school and Sabrina to fight it by reminding her that she’s stronger than the Weird. When he’s unsuccessfully, he puts her under a spell and brings her home.
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Sabrina is in a dream trance when she comes face-to-face with the Weird as it informs her that she was the strongest host and also the most vulnerable one.
Upon waking up, Ambrose informs her that despite their procedure to rid her of the octopus, she’s still being puppeteered by the Weird as it attached itself to her cerebellum (her consciousness).
Since Sabrina wants to be free of the Weird, Ambrose suggests infecting her brain with every disease known to witch and mankind as to make it inhospitable.
This is a bit more dangerous than draining her body of water as Ambrose tells her she has to have a stronger will than the Weird.
Nick is on-hand once again, and when Sabrina begins struggling to sing her mantra, he helps guide her by singing along with her. It may be the cutest moment of the whole series, and I’m not sure how Sabrina didn’t fall back in love with Nick in that exact moment.
After defeating the third eldritch terror, Sabrina learned that Lucas transferred to Riverdale High, which honestly, makes sense but also might not be that much better for him in the long run. Riverdale is just as crazy as Greendale!
Sabrina then confronts her inner-demons of loneliness and realizes that she needs to learn how to be alone and figure out who she is without a man. We’re here for a mature Sabrina.
Roz realizes she can’t tell Harvey that she’s a witch, but agrees to join Mambo Marie and Prudence in observing the realms for significant disruptions due to the coming of The Void via the eldritch terrors.
Despite pushing back initially, Prudence accepts Roz and declares the three of them the new “Weird Sisters.”
Faustus Blackwood is not concerned that the Weird failed because the next terror, the Perverse, is his favorite.
“The eldritch terror shall serve Blackwood,” he declares.
Considering that Sabrina and co. are three for three in defeating the terrors, maybe he should be a little more worried?
What did you think of the episode? What was your favorite moment?