It’s getting hot in here! Thank god for Jane the Virgin for getting me through these Monday blues. Before I recap this episode, I need to say how much I loved the talent show connection. Those girls at the catholic school brought the nuns to their knees. Fast forward years later and they’ve formed a friendship for years to come that can withstand pumping and dumping in the bathroom. Also, what clubs do they go to that the bathrooms are that clean? Please take me!
This was one of the first episodes that Jane didn’t spend all of her time focusing on Mateo. I love that about the show- most shows forget that the main character even had a baby, but here you see that child be front and center. So when Jane finally got some free time, she was feeling it. The free time also allowed her to breathe, clear her head and make a legit decision about who she wanted to be with.
Last week, Jane shared a spontaneous kiss with her baby daddy Rafael. But this week, she made out with Michael and there was snow. Snow! Michael is the one and although I’m disappointed, I understand. Michael was always the one and he would have still been the one if not for Rafael’s screwed up family and Louisa. Jane will always have feelings for Rafael, he’s the father of her child, but really, he came between an already happy couple.
Of course, when she told Xo that, Rafael overheard everything on the baby monitor and then pretended he was sound asleep. The look on his face was NOT pleased. Can’t blame him- he’s mad. He wanted to win her over, especially since they have a baby together. Now that she’s chosen, I think things are going to get ugly. Rafael is rash- he’s going to try to take custody of Mateo… or pursue his other baby momma Petra. Either decision will hurt Jane. Someone has to get hurt here you know.
And speaking of Petra, Rafael did kind of a selfless thing today, which is why I don’t think Milos’s arrival was completely out of the blue. Raf told his ex wife that the “turkey baster insemination” was a miracle because she was told previously that she was infertile. He wanted her to have the baby with another man. Then suddenly, Milos walks in and pretty much tells her she has no choice but to marry him. Can ya talk about a coincidence?!
Michael is also working his butt off on the Sin Rostro case. I swear, it’s as if nothing else important happens in Miami right? He got a lead on another one of Rose’s lovers- Heidi Von something Swedish. Rafael agrees to book her at the hotel so they can question her about Rose, but she has some hard feelings about “mudder,” which Michael thinks is just Swedish for mother. Later, Louisa is released and she too speaks of someone named “mudder.” Michael’s new partner explains that Mudder was a faceless criminal back in the 80s. It’s all a little messy but I mean, this is a soap opera. And also Louisa got in bed with the yodeling superstar so that’s even messier. Is it safe to assume Mudder is the lady whose calling shots from Sweden? Also- Michael’s new partner is bad news… she’s pretending to be all dumb blonde to find out what Michael is hiding for his boss. Not cool.
As for Rogelio, we find out when he was starting his acting career he joined Scientology. Now you know this is a total soap because that church wouldn’t just let him waltz out of there… just ask Leah Remini. But anyways, his ex wife is blackmailing him with old “confession” videotapes and so he has to hire her back for make love week. Thankfully, Xo comes up with a plan- they steal all of her bunnies and she hands over the tapes in exchange.
While it was a bizarre episode, it was fun and it never took itself too seriously and that’s what I watch Jane the Virgin for. A little bit of drama, mystery, soap opera shenanigans, love triangles, murders, and just a smidge of reality. And next week, Britney BITCH comes to the show and she dances “Toxic” with Jane. My Britney obsession can’t even right now.
TV Shows to Binge During Your Self-Quarantine and Social Distancing
In case you haven’t been keeping up with global news, coronavirus, COVID-19, is forcing everyone to practice the 2020 version of”conscious uncoupling” known as “social distancing.”
Many cities/states are on lockdown with bars, restaurants, and other establishments closing their doors to keep the outbreak from spreading even more than it has.
If you’ve found yourself self-quarantined at home on the couch to prevent the spread of germs, you’ll likely be looking for things to keep yourself occupied.
Many shows have shuttered production with daytime and late-night talk shows going sans audiences or completely dark for the remainder of the month.
And this means it’s the perfect time to binge-watch those shows you’ve been putting off.
Here are some shows to watch during your self-quarantine.
What the world needs now is a fixer who could tell us all how to get out of this mess. Since that’s not possible, we have the next best thing in Olivia Pope, DC’s fixer and right-hand to the President, who is also in a torrid love affair with him. It’s political, dramatic, and sexy as hell to this day.
Don’t you wish we could all travel back to a time before the coronavirus? Same. Maybe if we had a time machine like Lucy, Wyatt, and Rufus, we totally could. But alas, we’ll have to settle for watching their journey through key historical moments as they attempt to stop Rittenhouse from destroying the world.
Locke & Key
Think Harry Potter meets Narnia. Netflix’s new fantasy thriller finds a family moving into a mansion following their father’s death where they learn that it’s filled with secret keys that open up portals to other dimensions. You never know where you’ll end up, but it’ll make you forget you’re curled up on your couch amidst a toilet-paper shortage.
Elliot works as a cybersecurity engineer by day and doubles as a vigilante hacker by night. When he’s recruited by a mysterious underground organization, he’s forced to do things that make him question his personal beliefs, his morals, and most importantly, what’s real and what isn’t.
Financial burdens (like the fact that you spent all your money stocking up on canned goods and paper towels) plague three suburban moms who are tired of always playing “catch up.” They decide to take matters into their own hands and rob a grocery store. Soon, they find themselves trying to navigate a world of crime that has absolutely no rules. As they try to survive, their actions will keep you on the edge of your seat.
You’ve already heard of Stranger Things, and if you haven’t seen it yet, it’s high time you do. The series takes place in 1980s Indiana and follows a group of young friends who become privy to supernatural happening within the government.
There’s no better time than during a quarantine to watch all 16 seasons of Grey’s Anatomy. Honestly, when else are you going to have the time? All you need to know is that it’s a medical drama, there’s a doctor named McDreamy, and Shonda Rhimes is the boss babe behind it.
The Good Place is a stroke of comedic genius mixed with some of the most insightful and wholesome storytelling of our generation. It’s also the only series that had the perfect series finale (fight me, but after coronavirus cause there’s a no-touching ban). Eleanor Shellstrop is shocked to find herself in the Good Place following her death and immediately realizes she’s there by mistake. No one is prepared for her hilarious afterlife antics as she hides from architect Michael and her new friends while trying to become a better version of herself.
Don’t be deterred by the plot — a young Latina woman learns she’s pregnant after she’s accidentally artificially inseminated. The series weaves together the best parts of a telenovela while adding heart, feshed-out characters, strong female leads, irresistible love interests, and family at the forefront of every storyline.
Love is Blind
In the reality TV vein, Netflix delivered the world’s newest obsession. It’s a social experiment that many claim prepared our generation for dating throughout “social distancing.” Love is Blind forces a handful of contestants to meet people while isolated in pods. Once they find their “soulmate,” they propose to them without meeting face-to-face and a few weeks later, walk down the aisle.
If you’re not familiar with Joe Goldberg, you’re missing out. YOU is a suspenseful thriller that digs into the mind of an obsessed serial killer and follows his romantic relationships.
Game of Thrones
Similarly to Greys Anatomy, when else are you going to find the time to watch all of Game of Thrones? This is the perfect time to dig into a pop culture phenomenon so you know what “winter is coming” means the next time someone mentions it.
The Marvelous Ms. Maisel
If there’s anyone that can cheer you up and put a smile on your face, it’s Ms. Maisel. Set in the late 1950s, Miriam aka “Midge” breaks the rules and pursues a career in stand-up comedy. While it’s unheard of for women of her class to pursue a career, it’s even more unheard of a woman succeeding in such an industry. But leave it to Midge to prove everyone wrong and do it with flair and style!
Jane the Virgin – Chapter One Hundred (5×19)
It should be noted that I had to tell myself to be brave while writing this review and wiping away so many happy tears.
As far as series finales go, Jane the Virgin’s hit every mark and was a treat for longtime fans.
One would say it was the inverse of what made Jane the Virgin such a household name; it bypassed the usual telenovela-twists and opted for happy endings all around.
There will always be things that I wish would have happened, but confined to a one-hour window, the finale was pretty perfect.
Jane the Virgin – Chapter Ninety-Eight (5×17)
How do we say goodbye?
Xiomara posed that very question at the end of Jane the Virgin Season 5 Episode 17, and nothing sums up my feelings more succinctly.
We’re almost at the end, and despite this being the weakest season to date, it’s still bittersweet.
Look, nothing against anyone on the Jane the Virgin team.
Putting together a final season is a tall order, and appeasing everyone is nearly impossible.
We’re always going to have a bone to pick with something. That’s just life.
Nevertheless, I’m enjoying this strange ride for what it is and soaking up these last moments with the Gloriana Villaneuva family.
The realistic moments of the episode were really great, but the moments that leaned heavily into telenovela territory fell short.
Rose’s masterplan was revealed and to be honest, it was lame and non-existent.
Everything she’s ever done was motivated by her love for Luisa.
She broke out of jail and created an army of minions in order to be with her one true love.
If Luisa hadn’t betrayed Rose, Rose wouldn’t have had any motive to come after Jane.
Rose has been an elusive and terrifying villain all these years, but she just felt like a run-of-the-mill villain when she ambushed Jane.
Yes, I was a nervous wreck the entire time, but only because I expected Rose to already have people at Mateo’s school waiting for him or something.
Did anyone even know where Mateo was at the time? And why did no one come to check in on Jane?
Then, Rose’s grand plan was to sneak into the This Is Mars party essentially wearing alien costumes from Spirit Halloween.
What happened to the plastic surgery genius who could change her appearance at the snap of her fingers?
The one who befriended Michael as Susanna and faked his whole death?
We needed that Rose to come out and play.
Read the full review at TV Fanatic!
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