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Mystery Girls

Mystery Girls- Death Becomes Her (1×01)

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The new ABC Comedy Mystery Girls was kind of a bust… and no I’m not referring to Tori Spelling although maybe I should be. Jennie Garth is much better then this, right? The idea of creating a reunion show for two-ex-90210 co-stars was valid, but without a legit concept, it’s not going to go too far. I think that the point is for this show to be goofy and have everyone know that there’s nothing serious about it, but it just doesn’t give me a reason to watch. 

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The show reunites two starlets from the 90’s sitcom Mystery Girls, who decide to launch their own detective agency by the same name after Nick witnesses a murder and vows to only speak to the objects of his “obsesh”.  Holly, (Spellings character) is the ditsy blonde, who lives in her past– a time when she wasn’t a has been. For some reason people still care about her in this episode a rumor is spread through TMZ that Holly has died. Even though she walks into the office soon-after, she goes along with the grim rumor because all of her belongings are selling really well on e-bay. Um…ok. Holly is also completely obsessed with her looks. Newsflash!! she doesn’t good looks! I mean, does anyone else think Tori is aging really horribly? And at the age that Tori and Jennie are, could they not actually act their age?

Jennie plays Charlie, the more down-to-earth, rational one of the two, whose a little bored with her life in the suburbs with her attractive husband. While there isn’t much to her story just yet, I couldn’t help but think I was watching Val in What I Like About You. I’d like to give Jennie the benefit of the doubt and think that she’s actually a good actress, so why can’t she portray this character differently then she portrayed Val. Charlie’s personality is just as up-tight as Val’s. The perfectionist tendencies, the bigger sister mindset, it’s all in place. I mean, at this point Holly Tyler should just walk right through the door. Wait, Holly? That was also her sisters name in WILAY! Coincidence? I think not. The producers of this show (Jennie and Tori) hoped to make this a success based on the fans nostalgia of 90210 and What I Like About You. Don’t we deserve something new? Something worthy of our time?

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Then there’s Nick, the girls gay assistant and the most cliche gay guy on television. Really, all he says is fabulous, claps his hands and screeches about Lady Gaga tickets, which I find kind of offensive because I know so many gay guys and none of them are like this. That aside, he’s obsessed with Holly and is the reason these two are reuniting in the first place.

 ABC Family aired the third episode of the season first, which was probably done to make us more interested but I’m not sure how successful that was. The episode went from Holly faking a death to a sex scandal. One of Holly’s sex tapes went up on sale on Ebay and they made it their next mission to find the seller and destroy the tape before anyone got their hands on it. They threw a memorial for Holly who needed to see all the people from their show in order to confirm who she’s had sex with. After they found the lowlife, Nick stalled the attendees while the girls went to the lowlifes house and stole the tape, conveniently labeled “dirty girl” or something like that. It was honestly so stupid that I literally asked myself if I was seriously wasting my time watching this. The answer was yes, yes I was. In the end, everything ended on a peachy note. They got the tape, they watched it, they realized it actually wasn’t Holly, but Charlie dressed as Holly. It ended with the trio working out to one of Holly’s old work-out videos as they all continued to live in the past. 

JENNIE GARTH, MIGUEL PINZON, TORI SPELLING

One thing is for sure. Art is imitating life. The show is about washed up starlets looking for fame, and that’s exactly what Tori and Jennie are doing in real life. They too are washed up starlets from an old show looking for some form of relevance in the current times. And I don’t know which is worse. Watching Holly and Charlie struggle or watching Jennie and Tori struggle. All I know is that I don’t want to live in the past.

What did you think of the show? Share your thoughts! 

 

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Coffee Table News

Young and Hungry Renewed; Ashley Tisdale Debuts New Hair

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Ashley Tisdale debuted blue locks earlier this week, but this good news makes her anything but blue. (Okay so it’s actually lavender). The producer posed with a Young and Hungry poster, celebrating the ABC Family show’s second pick up. *Insert Cheers Here*

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Photo Credit: Ashley Tisdale Instagram

‘Aaaaaahhhhh!!! @abcfamily picked up @youngandhungryabcf season 2!!! I am so excited I am literally kissing @wree’s a*s,’ Ashley captioned the photo.

Unfortunately, the same happiness cannot be shared with comedy Mystery Girls featuring Tori Spelling and Jennie Garth. The series originally got a season 2 pickup, but ABC Family has since decided against it.

The network also picked up one of it’s three procedural drama options, Stitchers. It passed on the tennis themed Unstrung and did not decide on the rehab drama Recovery Road.

According to Deadline.com Stitchers “follows a young woman recruited into a covert government agency to be “stitched” into the minds of the recently deceased, using their memories to investigate murders and decipher mysteries that otherwise would have gone to the grave.”

Young and Hungry was a no-brainer pick up compared to Mystery Girls. The show about a young entrepreneur and his witty young chef had a great and emotional cliffhanger at the end of season 1. It ranks as the number 1 in its time slot on basic cable in adults and women 18-34. It also received two Teen Choice Nominations.

 

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Mystery Girls

Mystery Girls- Pilot (1×04)

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For some absurd reason, the Mystery Girls’ series premiere was the 4 episode, while pilot played out mid season as a flashback episode revealing how Charlie and Holly came together after years of not speaking and formed their own Mystery Girls agency.

Reruns of Mystery Girls were on and while Charlie couldn’t stand watching because “she didn’t like to watch her boobs jiggle as she ran”, Holly was a mess eating ice-cream and reminiscing on the times she used to be famous.

TORI SPELLING, JENNIE GARTH

Holly gets called down to the police station to see Detective Dwayne Freeman, where she’s hilariously mistaken for a hooker. In that outfit, it’s not shocking. Holly has no taste in clothes. She finds out that she’s been called in to help solve a case. Not  because she played a detective on a show, but because this super gay witness is a huge Mystery Girls fanatic and refused to give his confession unless it was to a MG. Charlie was also called down to the station and surprisingly showed up from her lame life in the suburbs. Both girls in the same room unofficially marked a MG reunion and Nick almost peed his pants from excitement. Nick gives his statement about how he saw one guy shoot another guy in the head by Katy Perry’s property on one of those Hollywood tours. When the girls go to lunch to catch up, they spot a man who matches the description of the shooter Nick saw.

Holly devises a plan to pretend to be waitresses and question him. Unfortunately, things don’t go according to plan. Holly prematurely whips out her pink fuzzy handcuffs and attacks the guy. As it turns out, she handcuffed the wrong guy. He’s just a local thief. Their adventure sparks an idea.Why don’t they take all their years of “detective” training and open up their own MG agency? Obviously Holly is on board while Charlie seems a bit skeptical (as she should be!).

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Holly opens the agency up herself, but has trouble landing any actual clients/cases. For some reason everyone thinks its a phone-sex hotline. Charlie comes down to meet Holly after realizing she missed her and wanted to join in on the MG venture. After trying to solve the crime last week, she felt like her old self and didn’t realize how much she missed being a Mystery Girl. Plus it doesn’t hurt that her family thinks she’s like the coolest mom ever. They begin their search for an assistant but Nick sends all the candidates away telling them the job has already been filled. He’s practically a third Mystery Girl and joins the team to help them clean up this city.

Nick turned one of the phone sex calls into their first case and is accepted onto the team. And that’s how the Mystery Girls story began!

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Mystery Girls

Mystery Girls- Haunted House Party (1×03)

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Who doesn’t love a good ghost story? I know I do which is why I wasn’t totally bored out of my mind watching this weeks Mystery Girls. I do have some realizations that I want to point out thought. The show focuses on two stars of an old 90’s show titled Mystery Girls, but no one seems to know who they are. And if they do, it’s only briefly mentioned. And second of all, I don’t even think their solving crimes in this new agency, which makes it so irrelevant. This week they were asked to go to a “haunted house” overnight to see if there were any ghosts. Like really? I could do that for $2000. 

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Anyways, the two bff’s grab all their ghost hunting gear and head on over to the house, which may or may not be haunted. The maintenance guy informed them of the woman who once lived in the house, Hester. Her husband disappeared during the war, and she waited around for 60 years hoping he would come back. When she passed they didn’t find her body for days and when they finally did, it was eaten up by her cats and dogs. Really romantic right? Well that’s the ghost that our Mystery Girls have to deal with. 

There was no ghost activity on the radar, but then Holly saw a “ghost” walking in the hallway. It ended up being Nick in his snuggie coming with some bloody marys. The whole thing played out super cliche. First Nick disappeared because of a rotating bookshelf, then Hester’s gold necklace appeared on Charlie, then a chandelier fell and Holly and Nick tried communicating through wiji board. The girls ended up getting into their usual fight, this time after Charlie called Holly out on her obsession with making decisions through the supernatural; psychics, 8balls, horoscopes. Case and point, she didn’t marry the love of her life Clyde because the horoscope said not to make any rash decisions that month. Only the horoscope was fake and written by Charlie who was trying to protect her friend from marrying a loser. Only problem. While Clyde might have seemed like a loser, he was a millionaire who owned a video game company or something like that. 

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Eventually, Charlie reads that Clyde’s wife died in an accident coming home from a gala and Holly takes that as a sign that Charlie saved her life. If she had married Clyde she would have been dead, which means she cheated death! They sleep through the whole night without any more ghost activity and report back to their boss, whose thrilled. Charlie decides to keep Hester’s gold chain, but upon learning that it brings the new owner bad luck and a life full of suffering, returns it to Hester and takes a vase instead. Mystery solved!

Really, sometimes I wonder why I even bother with this show. Nothing about it is good, funny or enjoyable. Except for Nick. Despite being the stereotypical gay guy, he’s actually quite funny to watch sometimes. Nick highlight of this week; escandal! 

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