To answer my burning question from last week, yes, Cheryl is locked up in the creepiest place known to Riverdale – the Sisters of Quiet Mercy.
However, things aren’t as bleak as they seem because if you remember, Polly was once a Sister’s prisoner and she made it out just fine. By the end, Cheryl also makes it out just fine, but is she herself fine?
It’s cockamamie that there is still a place that practices gay version, even in a town as peculiar as Riverdale.
When Penelope told Toni that Cheryl was away at boarding school it raised a couple of red flags especially for Veronica who knew, for certain, that there were only a few boarding schools in Switzerland and it was impossible as she wasn’t maniacally updating her social media with all the #views.
You would think that someone as mean-spirited as Cheryl wouldn’t have any ally’s in her corner, but she has a few good friends that care about her deeply, specifically Toni Topaz, who she’s developed a real connection with.
Honestly, we all need friends like Toni and Veronica who will pull through for you when your psychotic mother tries to beat the gay out of you. I think Penelope missed the memo — that’s not how any of this works in 2018.
Unfortunately, Josie showed her stripes and proved she’s not worthy of this friendship or of the student council seat.Did you see how quickly she bolted because of a drawing? Seriously girl, maybe this isn’t the town for you.
Toni in her Serpent jacket and Roni in her Britney Spears toxic-inspired getup marched through the underground tunnels, snuck into the church/convent/ insane asylum and raised hell.
It wasn’t long before Toni found Cheryl at movie night and they embraced in front of all the other poor souls trapped against their will. How romantic.
The symbolism of the red light as they ran down the stairs and into the dark night was not lost on me.
In fact, it added to the chilling visual of nuns running at you from all sides. What a terrifying sight.
Almost as scary as seeing poor Nana Rose crawl across the floor to phone a friend for help and then realize her own son, Claudius, cut the cord and was planning some form of excruciating punishment.
What is wrong with this family?
Can the ladies go save Nana next? She doesn’t deserve any of this.
Cheryl returned to school without even missing a beat, but I have to wonder where she’s staying nowadays. I hope she didn’t return to Thistle House like “hey, I’m back, did you miss me?” Did she sleep with one eye open hoping her mother didn’t send her away again? How is she going to make them pay for this? How will she ensure her safety going forward?
In the realm of Riverdale, Cheryl’s rescue was realistic and almost expected. In the real world, well, this was way too easy. How convenient was it that there was a tunnel that led right to Cheryl and the nuns didn’t even know about it?
And this wasn’t even the most exaggerated part of the episode.
We had Archie threatening a bunch of mobsters to “have Hiram’s” back. Yes, this zit-faced kid thought he stood a chance against a group of corrupt me. How laughable. Archie couldn’t intimidate a piece of toast. I mean, don’t get me wrong, he’s toughening up but really? Trying to mess with the mafia? Come on!
I can’t seem to understand why Hiram is asking a high school kid to do his dirty work in the first place. If he’s supposed to be this villainous character, how does he not know how to handle his own men and enemies? Why is his only fighting chance Archie and a football team who call themselves the “Dark Army.” Also, yeah, we’re back to this crusade.
I would blame Archie’s obsession with impressing Hiram on daddy issues, but it seems like Fred has always been a good and protective father. I think after the Black Hood shooting, he began to see his father as someone that’s “weak” and wanted to align himself with someone more alpha, and he found that in Hiram. He wants to be strong and powerful and fearless just like Roni’s father, so he’s trying to align with him and learn from him.
Unfortunately, it’s ruining his relationship with his father. He didn’t even show up for his mayoral announcement, which really disappointed Fred. I like Fred so it really sucks to see him be pushed to the side for someone “better.” There will be a moment where Archie will definitely regret this. On the plus side, it seems like Fred and Mary are connecting again and they’ll likely rekindle their relationship.
Mary definitely comes down harder on Archie than Fred does and she’s not afraid to confront him when he gets out of line.
She’s also right about Archie being a completely different person before he started dating Veronica. He played sports, he had friends, he smiled, and he wanted to be a musician. What went wrong? How did he get swallowed up whole by this little town and criminal Hiram? And no, I don’t believe Mr. Lodge is trying to come out on the straight and narrow.
The writers keep teasing the return of Black Hood but each time, it doesn’t seem like the actual villain from earlier seasons is returning, it’s just someone wearing a mask and committing crimes. And maybe, that’s the point. The realization that the “Black Hood” will never die because there will always be another guy doing bad things.
Personally, I’m over any story arc that has to do with Hiram and Archie, especially if it has to do with him buying love and loyalty through material objects. I expect that crap to work on Veronica but not Archie.
Far more interesting is the drama involving the Cooper and Jones families. Remember when Jughead and Betty stupidly dumped a car into a shallow swamp thinking no one would ever find it or the body of the man that Alice killed?
Well, Junkyard Steve found said car when he was draining the swamp!
A cumulative freak-out ensued, but FP assured them everything would be just fine if they stayed calm and laid low, two things Betty and Jughead aren’t known for.
They began sniffing around about the car and Kevin eventually revealed that the owner came to Riverdale and scooped it up.
For some reason, they trusted Chic enough to bring him into discussions about how to proceed and he stupidly reached out to the owner, Darla. For what exactly? I don’t know.
Why wouldn’t he just leave it alone?
When Darla tried to extort 10K from the Cooper’s, I thought maybe this was Chic’s plan all along. Maybe he was working with Darla and once she got the money, would disappear from Betty and Alice’s life forever. Honestly, they probably wouldn’t even care after all he’s put them through.
Unfortunately, Chic was more terrified by the situation than Betty and Alice combined, which just speaks to how useless he really is.
All he’s done since his arrival at the house is create problems and put them his mother and sister in danger. Not once has he offered up an actual solution to the problems he’s created either. In fact, it’s always been little Betty taking “care” of the situation.
Archie’s “hero” moment may have fallen flat and garnered a few chuckles from his enemies, but Jughead’s intimidation tactics are on point. He gets it from his papa, I’m sure.
When Betty called, he came to the rescue kicking down the door, looking all threatening and hot alongside his posse. That’s one thing I like about the Serpent’s; it’s a brotherhood. Even though Alice Cooper is Serpent enemy number one, they still came through for her when she needed help.
And turns out, that’s all Alice needed to finally “hear” what Betty’s been telling her all along. She apologized to the Serpent’s in person, put on some dark lipstick and made her way over to FP’s place, probably to rekindle that teenage romance. Did you see how happy he was when she arrived at his place?
I’m actually surprised Jughead didn’t bring FP along to handle something this serious but you know, shifts at Pop’s are aplenty.
Usually, I’d be disturbed by a mother-daughter duo dating a father-son duo but in this case, they all do make a pretty cute and badass family.
Although, I have to point out that this town needs to stop relying so much on high school students and get some more police. Sheriff Keller is trying, I’m sure, but he’s also busy doing the former Mayor. Priorities.
Jughead has really grown into a character that commands a room and wants to be the voice for those who can’t yet speak up for themselves. I truly hope he and Betty win the student council race. Maybe Betty’s future tattoo will help convince the Serpent’s to give them the vote. I mean, she’s practically an honorary serpent at this point.
Cheryl’s storyline may have felt aimless at times, but it served its purpose, leading us right into Kevin’s Carrie musical. And yes, Cheryl really does make the perfect Carrie White, a girl who was made a victim by her own unstable religious fanatic mother. Sound familiar?
Riverdale – Fast Times at Riverdale High (4×02)
Riverdale is back in its groove in the second installment of season 4.
The series is really embracing the high school vibe with everyone gearing up to go back to school for their senior year.
But for the viewers who have experienced the rollercoaster of G&G and The Farm, it all feels a little juvenile and boring.
The biggest foe in town right now is a man named Mr. Honey who is anything but sweet.
He’s the principal replacing Weatherbee and making it a mission to make Riverdale High a safe place to be.
Except that safe doesn’t exist in this town.
Mr. Honey’s biggest issue right now is with Cheryl Blossom, and when he calls the cops to file a noise complaint against her party, she realizes it’s going to be war.
The only way Mr. Honey can be redeemed is if he’s somehow tied into the mystery of this town.
Is he part of an urban legend? Is he working for The Farm? I’ve learned many moons ago not to trust anyone in Riverdale.
As Veronica dealt with the media fallout of her parent’s incarceration, she realized her Lodge reputation probably isn’t ideal for college applications and decided to change her name to Veronica Gomez.
No telling if the name change is going to affect her person, but if it means she won’t be performing pieces like “All That Jazz” anymore, we don’t want it.
Archie came to the defense of Reggie, who was still getting pushed around by his abusive father.
Reggie didn’t take gently to Archie defending him in front of his dad considering his father frowns upon weakness, but he definitely got his dad’s attention when he smashed up his expensive car.
Betty continued to work with her half-brother Charles, whom I don’t fully trust, to infiltrate The Farm somehow.
Their best bet to get in and check on their mother, who hasn’t responded in days, is Kevin, which should tell you everything you need to know about the operation their running.
Kevin came to apologize to Betty and call a truce, but she wasn’t over the fact that he tried to drag her by her ankles to a lobotomy.
Sorry, you don’t just bounce back from that Kev.
Betty and Charles didn’t fully trust him so they tested him and he failed with flying colors.
But eventually, Betty knew she had to tell him the truth if she wanted him to help, so she told him about his mother being undercover at the Farm.
When he told Fangs about the fake witness, he was able to see where Edgar and his minions are hiding out.
Let’s get mama Alice out of there.
Jughead’s storyline was probably the most interesting because he was recruited to a prestigious (and privileged) school titled Stonewall.
The teacher, Mr. Chipping, came to recruit him personally and despite initial hesitation, Jughead was loving that the school and students dedicated themselves to learning.
If I’m honest, though, the school looks like the kind of place where weird things happen and things go wrong.
When FP said his father went missing while attending the school, it was obvious that Jug’s time at Stonewall wouldn’t be spent discussing Moby Dick.
What are they up to in that school?
Betty’s support meant the world, even if we’re opposed to Jughead transferring. (We don’t mind his uniform one bit, however.)
We can’t have him looped out of the core four.
And lastly, Cheryl seems like she has it all together, but it’s growing increasingly alarming that she’s chatting up her corpse of a brother like it’s no big deal.
Cheryl hasn’t told Toni about it nor does she want anyone to know so at least we know that below the surface she knows it’s wrong.
What did you think of the second episode of Riverdale Season 4?
Are you intrigued yet or are they off to a slow start?
What do you think happens to Jughead?
Riverdale – In Memoriam: A Prayer for Fred Andrews (4×01)
“Fred Andrews will always be a part of Riverdale.”
Cue the ugly crying.
How do you write a goodbye episode to a beloved character and an even better actor portraying that character?
Somehow, Riverdale felt up to the task as the premiere paid a beautiful tribute to the late Luke Perry.
Expectedly, it hit us right in the feels.
Perry, best known for portraying Archie’s father, Fred Andrews passed away suddenly in March after suffering a major stroke.
Riverdale purposefully didnt address Perry’s death last season; since it was so sudden, it didn’t fit the story they were in the midst of telling nor did it allow them to pay homage properly.
But the premiere dedicated a whole hour to honor Perry. The outcome was a heartfelt and beautifully constructed episode that honored Perry’s beautiful soul, Fred, and the legacy he leaves behind.
Characters die all the time on TV shows but it’s usually because they’re getting written off of shows.
It’s sad and moving, but it’s not permanent. This circumstance was different. It was an untimely death of an incredible person who inspired millions.
At the kickstart of Riverdale’s fourth season, Jughead gives fans an update on where things are now in the small town.
The mayhem has sad settled, the events of the farm have all but been forgotten, and G&G was the stuff of (sub)urban legends.
In fact, the town was gearing up for their first 4th of July celebration in the nearly 3 years that Jason Blossom was murdered.
But celebrations aren’t a thing that Riverdale does well.
The event that rocked Riverdale this time cut far deeper than any derange cult leader, murderous black hood, or addictive brainwashing game ever could.
It was the death of one of their own – their hero – a bright light amongst the darkness.
A man who loved Riverdale through the good and the bad and helped build the city from the ground up with his bare hands.
In a town filled with corruptness and evil, Fred Andrews was one of the good guys; he was the heart and soul of Riverdale.
He even died a hero in a hit and run accident while helping a woman change her tire in neighboring Cherry Creek.
Now, if you weren’t in tears almost immediately after Riverdale began, you were when Shannon Doherty (Perry’s on-screen love interest on 90210, the show that made him an 80s hearthrob) graced the screen.
As a Catholic but not overly religious person, this was the first time I’ve ever seen someone pray on television and do so in such a simple, unifying way.
And on Riverdale of all shows — they had demonic monsters as part of their last season.
Yet, death brings people from all walks of life and beliefs together. Religious preferences or lack-there-of didn’t matter at this moment. All that mattered was the collective grieving over a man who spanned generations and equally earned the title of “heartthrob” and “dad.”
Archie’s grief presented a rollercoaster of emotions from shock to disbelief to anger to the eventual breakdown that usually signifies acceptance of reality.
It was painful to watch Archie work through his grief, but it meant that KJ Apa was doing the role justice.
It probably helped that all the emotions he was portraying were real.
This episode hit home to all of them.
First Archie questioned whether it was really his dad who was killed and sent Veronica and Betty to double check.
Denial is a common emotion, but this is so very Riverdale of him.
Anything is possible in Riverdale, and Archie knows you always have to confirm a body.
When FP called and told Archie they caught the guy who did it, Archie was filled with rage and went to the house to get some revenge.
But that didn’t make him feel any better. In fact, he felt worse because he realized that it was a father protecting his son who pulled a classic Archie move and stole the car without having a license.
Archie remembered just how self-less his father’s love was and immediately felt like a bad son.
Eventually, Veronica convinced him that if anyone was half as good as Fred, it was him. He was his father’s son, after all.
So, Archie got it together and finished what he came to do.
As he drove Fred’s body home, he was led by a police escort from FP.
And much to his surprise, as he drove his dad through his hometown one last time, he was greeted by a unified town all gathered to pay their respects.
It was a moving scene and probably the 15th time I cried within the 45-minute span.
The parade, initiated by Cheryl, took place instead of the 4th of July celebration proving that Riverdale is a town that needs to show that they can continue to rise up from tragedies that seem to always fall on a long weekend.
It also proved that despite her bitchiness and possible unstableness, Cheryl understood loss more than anyone else in town and never wanted the Andrews family to feel the pain and loneliness she felt.
As heartbreaking as that is, I find solace in her acknowledgment that Jay Jay is actually dead. One could get the wrong idea from that quick snippet of Cheryl reading the paper to Jason’s mummified corpse.
The show barely touched upon any last season leftovers, but it does need to be explored in the coming episodes. Maybe this is how we’ll get roped back into The Farm?
Fourth of July will now be a day of remembrance in Riverdale — to remember Jason Blossom and to remember Fred Andrews.
In some way, Fred reignited hope in a town that wanted to honor him and live up to his expectations.
Even villains and enemies like Hiram Lodge put aside their differences as he paid for Fred’s funeral in full.
This moment and Betty’s scene where she visited her disgraced father (his tombstone was covered in graffiti calling him a murderer) only highlighted Fred’s inherent goodness.
After the funeral, everyone came together to watch a beautiful fireworks display that Fred would’ve undoubtedly loved.
Riverdale makes it clear that it’s always necessary to find the light amongst the darkness.
At its core, that’s what Riverdale is — under all the mystery and darkness its just a show about a small town of heroes and friends navigating this thing called life together.
They may have lost their bright light, but he will live on in the town’s buildings, their hearts and most importantly, our memories.
RIP Fred Andrews. RIP Luke Perry.
Riverdale will never be the same, and that’s thanks to you.
Fall TV Preview: Riverdale Season 4 Trailer Reveals Jughead is Missing
The Riverdale trailer for season 4 is equal parts sexy and mysterious (what the hell happened to Jughead?!)
The series creators promised the season would be more high-school oriented giving it a “season 1” vibe following a dark, twisted, and oftentimes, ridiculous (we still loved it) G&G/ The Farm storyline on season 3.
And while they’re making good on that promise — we see Cheryl and the like prancing around the halls of Riverdale High — the show still capitalizes on the darker undertones and secrets.
This is a town that thrives on murder, and that’s never going to change.
The teens grapple with a pretty daunting realization — they’re going to have to part ways after senior year.
“Isn’t it crazy? In just nine-months, life as we know it will be over,” Veronica (Camila Mendes) muses without realizing the statement is more ominous than she intended.
The trailer reveals that one favorite may not make it through their senior year alive as the whole town embarks on a search mission through the volatile woods of Riverdale.
Who are they looking for? Our very own Jughead Jones.
Fans expected a rocky season for Jug following the cliffhanger of season 3, which saw him missing as Betty, Veronica and Archie cleaned up the blood from their clothes, but this has us officially worried.
Later in the trailer, we hear Jughead’s screams as he begs for “help” and tries to break out of what sounds like a car trunk.
What happened to Jughead? And is his disappearance linked to whatever happened in the final episode?
Other major moments in the trailer include Betty getting clobbered over the head from behind by an unknown figure (she’s after the Farm so it could be Evelyn Evernever), crime scene photos that make Betty gasp “oh my god,” a scantily dressed Veronica performing some pussycat dolls-esque routine on stage as she assures that she’s “no stranger to scandal,” and a bunch of smokin’ sex scenes with our three favorite ships: Choni, Bughead, and Varchie.
Yep, sounds like senior year!
Not spotted in the video: Alice Cooper, who we found out is infiltrating The Farm, anyone from The Farm (Chad Michael Murray, where ya at?), Kevin, also with the damn Farm, and Betty’s real brother, Chic, who was introduced in the finale as an FBI agent working with Alice to take down The Farm.
Riverdale premies October 9th on The CW!
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