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Riverdale

Riverdale Review – Rumors of My Death Have Been Greatly Exaggerated (4×16)

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In the end, it was all so simple.

As the Riverdale episode walked us all through the Stonewall Prep mystery step-by-step, I found myself wondering how it didn’t occur to me that the Stonewall Four and the Baxter Brothers novels were connected.

The link was so obvious and right there waiting for all of us, but alas, it goes to show you that Riverdale’s writers always know what they’re doing even if the episodes sometimes seem outrageous, unbelievable, or a mix of both.

When the puzzle pieces began falling into place, the fourth season of The CW campy drama turned out to be its best one yet.

While the Gargoyle King, the Farm, and the Black Hood were all compelling and intricate mysteries in their own right, this season dove into the heart of a “whodunnit” while layering on a “whydunnit” on top for a classic “locked room” mystery.

It was incredibly satisfying to see Jughead and Betty present their case to the Stonies and watch the smug little faces squirm. Well, mostly Donna and Mr. DuPont’s. Brett was entirely too confused for his own good to the point that it was hard to believe we ever thought that he was the mastermind behind all of this.

As the layers were peeled back, the true villain of the series was revealed. Mr DuPont stole the Baxter Brother’s franchise (then just one novel) from Forsythe, killed all three members of the original literary society who knew about it to cover his tracks and prevent the truth from tainting his career.

He then built a whole franchise and a “prestigious school” on the murderous lies.

Each new writer that took over the Baxter Brother’s franchise needed to prove they could commit the perfect murder before they could write it. With this in mind, Jughead was never going to win the writing competition, and he was solely there to draw out his grandfather, the one loose end that DuPont wanted to kill and shut up.

Considering how easily Jughead found his grandfather, you’d think a savvy man like DuPont who managed to have a huge body count and cover it up would have found him without going through all this trouble, but that would defeat the whole point of the series.

When DuPont was cornered with the truth — that his life’s legacy was a sham and built upon the blood of others — he refused to go down as a fraud. Death was better than a tainted legacy and thus, he jumped from the very same window that Mr. Chipping did, which was obviously going to happen. How did they not foresee that?

Related: ‘Riverdale’ Production Postponed Due to Coronavirus

While DuPont deserved a fare harsher punishment, it’s better than nothing.

However, the fact that Donna and DuPont weren’t in cahoots was shocking. There was a brief moment where it seemed like Donna was simply a victim despite her deranged scheming, but it was quickly revealed that she had her own motive for going through with enforcing the perfect murder with her classmates — she wanted revenge.

Remember when Hermosa dug up some dirt on Donna that tied it all together for Jughead? Well, the dirt was that she was the granddaughter of Jane Dallas Brown, one of Mr. DuPont’s original three victims.

Her beef was never truly with Jughead or Betty, they were merely victims of a much grander plan which was to take over the Baxter Brothers and have DuPont pay the ultimate price.

Unfortunately, she messed with the wrong sleuthing detectives who stop at nothing to get answers.

Also, Joan didn’t hit Jughead hard enough to kill him. Honestly, that was mistake number one because their plan was foolproof and gave them all alibis.

All of their problems would have been solved had Jughead remained dead, but instead, he used all his time pretending to be dead in Dilton’s doomsday bunker (which could come in handy now with the coronavirus and all) to solve the mystery that’s been plaguing his life since he transferred to Stonewall Prep.

Donna’s desire for revenge was justified, but since she also killed innocent people who were just casualties of a bigger fight, which doesn’t make her any better or any less guilty than DuPont.

As for Chipping, he was driven mad by the guilt of what he had done to secure the contract. He brought Moose there under false pretenses because he was the perfect target to be killed, however, he began to feel bad and thus, gave Moose and out by recruiting him to the army before he took his own life.

Almost every loose end was tied up as we went through what happened that night in the woods, shortly after as Betty, Archie, and Veronica truly didn’t know if Jughead would survive, and in the weeks leading up to their takedown.

I said almost because there are still some things left unanswered. Riverdale is a sucker for a mystery within a mystery and while Charles may have been instrumental in saving Jughead and helping them plan the perfect murder, we also know he has a vendetta of his own (with his boyfriend Chic) against the Cooper/Jones family.

When is that going to be brought back into play? Also, are they responsible for those odd and stalker-ish videotapes?

The series goes into their musical episode next week which finds Kevin taking charge in Hedwig and the Angry Inch. Is that when we’ll also address the untapped feelings between #Barchie?

Cheryl made sure to note that it was obvious Betty and Archie weren’t just “faking it” with their fake relationship. There are some real feelings there, but does it matter when these couples are so strong and rooted in themselves?

Other Murder Capital of the World Musings

  • Jughead brought honor back to his family and retrieved what was stolen from his grandfather. Does this mean they will take over the mysteries of Tracy True?
  • Redeeming his grandfather’s name also reunited FP with his father. Moreso, it gave FP a reason for why his father abandoned them in the first place and it wasn’t because he was a good-for-nothing dad but because he wanted to protect himself and his family.
  • Riverdale is a complex town plagued by darkness and murder, but it was incredibly satisfying to see everyone working together in unison and being able to keep the secret so that Jughead could blow the lid off of the Stonewall conspiracy.
  • There’s nothing more enjoyable than Jughead and FP beating Brett with brass knuckles to get those sex tapes back. Man, that guy got a good, well-deserved beating. And I’m sure it felt good for Jughead to just get it out of his system.
  • Even Hermosa helped, which may be the first step in patching up her relationship with Veronica.
  • And seriously, Dr. Curdle Jr. for the win!
  • Is anyone else mad that Cheryl wasn’t in on the whole thing?
  • So… just to clarify — Jughead didn’t have a plan to expose Brett and get those sex-tapes back? If Joan succeeded in killing him, that would have been the end of our boy. One little oversight saved his life.
  • Food poisoning is code for five-feet under, right?
  • No one ever really dies in Riverdale, do they?
  • Mysteries aside the focus of the next few episodes will be to getJughead and Archie to the graduation line — no ifs, ands, or buts about it.

All-in-all, Betty and Jughead proved they’re the perfect couple by crafting the perfect (fake) murder and solving 8 murders, stopping DuPont, and getting closure for the families.

It’s a good day in Riverdale, and that’s rare, so let’s cherish it as we wait for the other foot to drop.


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Lizzy Buczak is the founder of CraveYouTV. What started off as a silly blog in her sophomore year at Columbia College Chicago turned her passion for watching TV into an opportunity! She has been in charge of CraveYou since 2011, writing reviews and news content for a wide variety of shows. Lizzy is a Music Business and Journalism major who has written for RADIO.COM, TV Fanatic, Time Out Chicago, Innerview, Pop’stache and Family Time.

Riverdale

Riverdale Review – Mothman (5×06)

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Riverdale Back to School Review Season 5 Episode 6

 

You never truly get over the first day of school jitters, even seven years after you’ve graduated. 

Veronica, Betty, Archie, and Jughead returned to Riverdale High on Riverdale Season 5 Episode 6, but this time, they weren’t students, they were teachers. 

Archie was spearheading the RROTC, Jughead was teaching English, Veronica tackled Economics, while Betty handled Shop Class, which personally, I found to be the most interesting. I would’ve never pegged our sweet FBI recruit for a car gal.

Everyone was there to restore Riverdale to the great town that it once was, well, aside from all the murder.

But in a weird way, it’s almost as though they’ve never really grown up. 

This criticism is specific to Cheryl, who still seems way overly invested and possessive over the Vixens.

It’s a bit strange that she would get upset and jealous over Toni reviving the cheerleading squad when she had seven years to manage the team and hid out in Thornhill. 

But it’s obvious that this is how the show aims to bring back Cheryl to some sense of reality, and it’s better that she’s at least involved in the school functions rather than hiding in her mansion afraid of some made-up Blossom curse. 

If everyone is going to get a gig at the high school, it only makes sense that Cheryl and Toni return as co-HBIC’s.

Riverdale’s success went against Hiram’s plans to destroy the small-town, so he sent his goons from the Stonewall Prep football team to start a fire at the school and send a little message. 

But since Archie is never one to back down without a fight, he decided to revive Riverdale’s football team, the Bulldogs. 

I’ll admit that it was sad to see that the team, which has brought so much pride to town, was a “thing of the past.” However, with the right coach, it could be the town’s pride and joy once again.

Hope can go a long way. Hiram knows that, which is why he’ll do anything to see Riverdale fail.

Interestingly, we’ve yet again returned to the Hiram versus Archie Andrews dynamic. Archie will forever remain a thorn in his side. 

It’s also upsetting to see Reggie side with Hiram; he’s lost sight of everything that’s important. 

Riverdale Back to School Review Season 5 Episode 6

Riverdale — “Chapter Eighty-Two: Back To School” — Image Number: RVD506fg_0016r — Pictured (L-R): Drew Ray Tanner as Fangs Fogarty, Casey Cott as Kevin Keller, Chris Mason as Chad Gekko, Lili Reinhart as Betty Cooper and KJ Apa as Archie Andrews — Photo: The CW — © 2021 The CW Network, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

Archie runs into a bit of trouble securing funding for the football team. He tries to play to “dead brother” card to Cheryl, but it doesn’t go well. 

Why do they think Cheryl has the money to singlehandedly fund the town? Even if she is selling fake art and passing it off as the original, it’s not her responsibility to dole out mounds of cash for the local high school.

He eventually resorts to asking Veronica for help, and if you thought it was weird asking your ex for $20K (even though she was more than happy to contribute to her beloved Bulldogs), just imagine how weird it is to get pushback from her overly jealous husband.

There were some cute moments between Ronnie and Chadwick, but ultimately, he’s a snake that’s controlling and doesn’t have Veronica’s best interests at heart.

He brought up doing nice things for her like singing karaoke and being nice to her friends as if they were some kind of chore or like he was doing her a favor to keep her happy. In a normal relationship, those are acts of love. 

It was the final straw – well, that and finding out that he’s been secretly chatting with Hiram – that convinced Veronica that they needed to take a break. 

Veronica was living a fake life in New York, but by returning to Riverdale, she once again remembered who she was and what mattered to her. 

She and Chadwick simply aren’t on the same wavelength.

However, I don’t want her and Archie to get back together in the near future either. 

Archie’s relationship with Betty is really growing on me; it’s refreshing and fun to watch. (More of my thoughts on that here!)

Of course, sneaking around when you’re in your mid-twenties should be a lot easier, but I’m not going to complain about that Titanic re-enactment in the car either.

Things between them are steamy. 

And if we were just to revert to the previous couples, hitting reset on the show would all be for nothing. 

Plus, there are definitely some sparks flying between Jughead and Tabitha Tate.

While the show never established how old Tabitha was, the fact that she made six-figures in Chicago and could have taken a CEO job at any point alludes to her being around the same age as Jughead. 

Initially, Tabitha was a little weary of Jughead, but he seems to have grown on her as she’s even offering to help him work on his story!

Aside from his brief interactions with Archie, Jughead spent much of the episode secluded from his old friend group and getting more familiar with his new boss. 

He interviewed Tabitha for his small-town story, but she did him a solid and set him up with Dreyfus, a local who told him his story of the Mothman, who kidnapped his friends working the mines and took them abroad some kind of ship. 

Yes, it sounds like folklore, but may I remind you that the mines are near Greendale, and we know that supernatural entities are in abundance there. (It’s a Chilling Adventures of Sabrina reference.)

Jughead’s investigation led him to the realization that all of Dreyfus’ friends that went on the ship passed away from cancer. Coincidence or is there something more awry at play?

He also mentioned that the ship was in the woods in a cave off the Lonely Highway… and you know what else was last seen on the Lonely Highway? Polly… three days ago. 

Is there a chance the mothman is connected to Polly’s (and Freaky’s) disappearance? My gut instinct tells me there is. 

Betty put her FBI training to use as she investigated what happened to Polly. She learned that Polly would frequent truck stops to sell Jingle Jangle and hook up with truckers (boy, did her life really take a turn!) using Nedlist (lol) to set up meetings. 

Betty tracked down the last trucker Polly arranged a meeting with (Truckerboy69… really?!), but he informed her that Polly ran off that night in a panic. 

Betty then turned to Alice for help and together, the sleuthing mom-and-daughter duo located a bunch of Polly’s things on the side of the road. She eventually decided to ping Polly’s phone, which likely should have been her first move. Betty, Kevin, and Alice then took look around the marsh area at night (because waiting till morning would have been too logical) and stumbled upon a corpse’s hand sticking out from the ground. Does it belong to Polly? We’ll have to wait to find out. 

In addition to that cliffhanger, Hiram also sent Archie yet another message by setting a fire all around the perimeter of his home. I guess the message was “don’t play with fire,” and look, I get that Hiram goes to extremes to get what he wants, but almost killing someone is a bit much, don’t you think?

Overall, it was an interesting episode that set up plenty of new mysteries for audiences while also taking a sentimental trip down memory lane by focusing most of its events around Riverdale High. 

Other Small Town Musings

  • Hiram loves Doritos… who knew?
  • It’s hard to do justice by “Shallow” but Veronica and Chadwick killed it!
  • Nana has really upped her fashion game! Also, how is she still alive?
  • There was a brief Chilling of Adventures crossover when Dorcas made an appearance as Cheryl’s art appraiser Minerva Marble.
  • Doris Bell is one little snitch! Keeping Cheryl informed about what happens at Riverdale High is one thing, but giving intel to Hiram? Not cute. 

What did you think of tonight’s episode of Riverdale? Are you enjoying the post-time jump reality?

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Coffee Table News

New Couple Alert: ‘Katy Keene’s Lucy Hale and ‘Riverdale’s Skeet Ulrich Spotted Kissing

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'Katy Keene's Lucy Hale and 'Riverdale's Skeet Ulrich Spotted Kissing

This is one couple you didn’t see coming! Who would’ve thought we’d ever see a liar dating a serpent?

Pretty Little Liars and Katy Keene alum Lucy Hale was spotted packing on the PDA with Riverdale star Skeet Ulrich on Sunday, February 21!

Photos of their romantic outing were captured by Page Six.

You can see the 31-year-old star leaning in for a kiss with the 51-year-old actor. 

The duo were also spotted holding hands at the table.

Once they finished their meal, they put on their masks and the “Scream” alum embraced the actress from behind. 

Ulrich previously dated Megan Blake Irwin and were criticized for their 20-year-age difference, which she defended. 

While Ulrich and Hale starred in sister-show’s on the CW, they never crossed paths. Ulrich recently wrapped up his five-season arc as Forsythe Pendleton Jones II (FP Jones) on Riverdale, while Hale starred in the Riverdale spinoff Katy Keene as the titular character for one season before it got canceled.

Neither Ulrich or Hale have commented on the relationship.


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Let’s Talk About What #Barchie’s Steamy Shower Scene on ‘Riverdale’ Means for the Ship

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Let's Talk About What #Barchie's Steamy Shower Scene on 'Riverdale' Means for the Ship

It finally happened, #Barchie fans!

If you’re a #Bughead fan, you might want to stop reading at this point because this is a full post dedicated to the Betty and Archie hook-up!

After several seasons, Riverdale finally gave fans the Betty and Archie moment they’ve been waiting for.

This moment has been a long time coming.

There were some close calls through the years, though mainly, fans were left disappointed and wondering if the pairing would ever see the light of day.

At the end of season 4, the duo shared a romantic kiss but ultimately decided to bury their feelings out of respect for their significant others. 

But you don’t just write a love ballad for someone and forget about them!

The long-awaited and highly-anticipated moment finally came via a steamy shower sex scene following a seven-year time-jump. It was so hot, I found myself wondering if this is even allowed on The CW. That steam wasn’t from the hot shower, that’s all I’m going to say! 

Archie, who survived a war, and Betty, who has been catching serial killers while training to be an FBI agent at Quantico, reunited and fell right back into their old feelings without even realizing it. 

Post hook-up, when Archie questioned what just happened between them, Betty informed  him that it’s something “we’ve been wanting to do since high school but never got around to it.” And you have to appreciate her honesty here. 

Since they’re both mature and single adults — Archie’s ex Veronica is “happily” married, while Betty hasn’t been with Jughead for years — they decided to keep the moment of passion under wraps. 

Riverdale can be a bit ridiculous at times, but this was the smartest decision these two ever made. They don’t owe anyone, including Veronica and Jughead, anything. 

This moment singlehandedly changed the Betty and Archie relationship forever. 

And when I tell you fans were thrilled, I mean they were straight geeking out on Twitter. 

But what does this mean for #Barchie moving forward? Was it a one-time thing that they needed to get out of their system?

Based on the glowing aftermath, methinks not. The chemistry and sexual tension is there, and they’re clearly into each other. And for the first time, they’re both in a place where they can pursue a relationship. 

Well, there is the small issue of Betty’s boyfriend, Glen, back in Virginia, but I doubt that will pose much of a problem since she seemed to forget all about him. She didn’t even call him to inform him she decided to stick around for a while and teach at her old high school, which tells you everything you need to know! 

And while Archie and Jughead’s new roomie situation may make things a bit more complicated and awkward, I think Archie and Betty owe it to each other to explore these longtime feelings. 

They’ve never been given the opportunity to figure what these feelings truly mean — is it love or is it just lust? — because they’ve always repressed them out of respect for others. 

There’s no better time like the present to put them to the test.

Though, if I’m being completely honest, I don’t see it lasting long. I’d love the idea of #Barchie babies, but with the core four back in each other’s orbits, they’re bound to fall into old habits. 

Jughead and Betty don’t seem like they’re going to get back together anytime soon, but based on their conversation, they never got closure following their abrupt breakup. With a new mystery in tow, I see their paths merging again, though, I am really digging that Betty and Archie have been working together on the “Polly mystery.”

As for Ronnie, she may be married, but it’s not going to last long. She and Chadwick are already having marital issues that stem mainly from his insecurities and jealousy. I wouldn’t rule out a post-divorce reunion for Archie and Veronica. 

She’s always wanted someone who can handle her Lodge independence, and Archie has always been that man. 

So, while Betty and Archie might not be able to keep their hands to themselves in the short-term, I don’t think that there’s potential for them in the long run. And that’s okay too.

Sometimes the best thing before settling down is the fling you’ve always fantasized about!

At the end of the day, I’m rooting for the ships that will bring each other happiness — whoever that may be!

Don’t forget to check out our full review of Riverdale Season 5 Episode 5 now!  


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